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Old 09-10-2011, 20:47   #7961
Lone_Wolfe
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 23skidoo View Post
Let's try this again Babe, the sleep of the just.: hugs:: hearts:: smootchie:: iloveyou:
Guess you'll have to try yet again.....



Quote:
Originally Posted by BobInTX View Post
She actually lives about 2 1/2 hours from us. We get to see her this weekend, because it's her brother's fifth birthday. We haven't seen her in a month. Too long.
I agree, way too long.

I hope you were successful getting sleep. Tell your chest I said to quit *****ing and moaning. I'm sure that will help.
Sleep, what's that? My chest has a message for you, but it's not nice so I won't repeat it.

I tried again tonight, and had a nightmare, surprise surpise. This time was a little different though, I finally had at least a hint ot control. I've always had lucid dreams at times, some really interesting ones. I've even had ones where I dreamed that I knew I was dreaming. But when that dream is one of my nightmares it's like a switch is flipped and I have no control, awareness of it being a dream or anything.

Tonight's nightmare was pretty generic, it started out with me getting to relive running for the rocks and getting shot on the way, then going down in a heap as usual. But this time I was still moving and managed to get myself a lot closer to the rocks somehow.I think I must have gotten pretty close because Greg was able to drag me the rest of the way behind them wihtout getting shot himself. You'll love this part though.... Because I wasn't out in the open Greg didn't run out to try to save me, and didn't draw the third Afghnai out to be taken out, so the medic couldn't get to me and I died. OK, I can't win here.



Quote:
Originally Posted by Silent_Runner View Post
Wolfe you are not crazy! You know the difference between psychotic and crazy.: steamed: You also know I'm the only person here allowed to call you crazy.: tongueout:
Then say it, so I don't have to.

<<<


You have said very little for a few days. Why are you clamming up?
I just don't feel like talking.

It never hurts to try. Hopefully one of these days it will listen.
Hopefully

Those pictures of the fire look so awful. I will pray for everyone affected by it. I wish I could send some rain your way.
Same here, sending prayers up for everyone in the path of that. Bob, those pics are scary as hell!



Quote:
Originally Posted by Silent_Runner View Post
Wolfe?

Please check in here and say hello at least. It would be even better if you would talk to us.
OK, I'm here. I decided that with everything going on over the next several weeks with my job winding up I can't promise to get on here every day anymore. I'll try, and probably at least be able to poke my head in most days, but if I miss a day don't panic. That doesn't mean I don't want you folks to talk to me, I still do, and I'll answer all of you the next day if I miss. Also, don't get the impression I don't appreciate all of you, trust me I do.

It's early morming September 11th. What a sad day to remember what happened 10 years ago today.
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To those who have made the ultimate sacrifice while defending American freedom, you will not be forgotten.

RIP my friends Greg and Florence, see you again on the other side.
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Old 09-10-2011, 22:18   #7962
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Please sleep well Babe; are you expecting extra rockets from the hajjis since it's the 11th? Have a great day Babe.
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Old 09-11-2011, 12:05   #7963
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Remembering your cousin on this 9/11. We'll never forget.

Also remembering you, Greg and all the others fighting this war that we didn't want but had to fight.



Even though you died that dream is exciting to me. Keep visualizing. I think you are making things happen. And Greg didn't die! Yea!
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Old 09-11-2011, 13:01   #7964
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Remembering all who were and still are affected by the actions of the terrorists 10 years ago. I WILL NEVER FORGET!

We are where the surgery will be done on my back. My appointment is Monday 9 am to SEE the surgeon and then they have to schedule the surgery. Hoping they will do it quickly as this pain is intense and I am so tired of it! Also, I need to get home and find a job...and get the kids enrolled in school (it's already very late). Praying the finances hold out. It's going to be tight, but I'm sure God will see us through. It was suggested we stop by the Police station and ask for salvation army vouchers for help...we tried it ONCE and was TOTALLY derided by how irresponsible it was of me to make the trip without making sure we had the money...so I don't guess I'll try THAT again.

Anyway...Wolfe, you know you are in my prayers...please, talk to us and don't ignore us. We WANT to be here for you, we WANT to talk to YOU even if you don't want to talk to US. You are important to us, don't forget that!
Hugs, though EXTREMELY gentle ones.
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Old 09-11-2011, 14:15   #7965
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lone_Wolfe View Post
OK, I'm here. I decided that with everything going on over the next several weeks with my job winding up I can't promise to get on here every day anymore. I'll try, and probably at least be able to poke my head in most days, but if I miss a day don't panic. That doesn't mean I don't want you folks to talk to me, I still do, and I'll answer all of you the next day if I miss. Also, don't get the impression I don't appreciate all of you, trust me I do.

It's early morming September 11th. What a sad day to remember what happened 10 years ago today.
Wolfe I understand you may have trouble getting on some days for a while but please don't disappear on us. We worry about you when you are not here to talk.

Quote:
Originally Posted by 23skidoo View Post
Please sleep well Babe; are you expecting extra rockets from the hajjis since it's the 11th? Have a great day Babe.::
23skidoo bite your tongue about rockets on her base!

Quote:
Originally Posted by BobInTX View Post
Remembering your cousin on this 9/11. We'll never forget.

Also remembering you, Greg and all the others fighting this war that we didn't want but had to fight.



Even though you died that dream is exciting to me. Keep visualizing. I think you are making things happen. And Greg didn't die! Yea!
Thank you for posting this. Today is the tenth anniversary of the day that caused everything we have talked about in this thread to happen. Wolfe do you remember the promise you made in here two years ago? You keep on fighting and never let them beat you!

I agree with BobInTX about your dream. I know Greg doesn't always die in them but this is the first time I have heard you talk of being able to try to help yourself after being shot.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Lady Glock View Post
Remembering all who were and still are affected by the actions of the terrorists 10 years ago. I WILL NEVER FORGET!

We are where the surgery will be done on my back. My appointment is Monday 9 am to SEE the surgeon and then they have to schedule the surgery. Hoping they will do it quickly as this pain is intense and I am so tired of it! Also, I need to get home and find a job...and get the kids enrolled in school (it's already very late). Praying the finances hold out. It's going to be tight, but I'm sure God will see us through. It was suggested we stop by the Police station and ask for salvation army vouchers for help...we tried it ONCE and was TOTALLY derided by how irresponsible it was of me to make the trip without making sure we had the money...so I don't guess I'll try THAT again.

Anyway...Wolfe, you know you are in my prayers...please, talk to us and don't ignore us. We WANT to be here for you, we WANT to talk to YOU even if you don't want to talk to US. You are important to us, don't forget that!
Hugs, though EXTREMELY gentle ones.
We will all never forget.

I pray that your surgery goes well and you are able to get back home safely.
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Originally Posted by Lone_Wolfe
I mean, Iím mentally ill, not mentally deficient! There's a difference between psycho and stupid.
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Old 09-11-2011, 20:07   #7966
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Originally Posted by 23skidoo View Post
Please sleep well Babe; are you expecting extra rockets from the hajjis since it's the 11th? Have a great day Babe.: hearts:: smootchie:: iloveyou:
Don't give the hajji's no damn ideas!!!!!

Actually it was quiet here today.



Quote:
Originally Posted by BobInTX View Post
Remembering your cousin on this 9/11. We'll never forget.
Thank you for remembering. A now-distant memory of someone I barely knew, but didn't deserve to die that day. No one deserved to die like that, except maybe the hijackers themselves.

Also remembering you, Greg and all the others fighting this war that we didn't want but had to fight.
I went to a memorial ceremony today, and looked around at everyone there thinking about how different our lives are than they would have been if 9/11 had never happened. Greg would be alive, I wouldn't have gotten shot, all the civilians there would be working Stateside jobs, some of the military people too. Other military would be stationed in the States most likely, maybe Japan or Germany, but not in the middle of a war. Pretty sobering to think about how much the events of one day changed the world.



Even though you died that dream is exciting to me. Keep visualizing. I think you are making things happen. And Greg didn't die! Yea!
As Silent_Runner said, there's been other times when Greg didn't die, or at least I din't think he did. Most of the ones where I die quickly, like when the bullet gets through the armor I don't dream of him coming out to me very often. What was different about this dream is that it's the first time I had any ability at all to try to move and try to get to cover after getting hit. I still like the idea better of being able to dodge the bulllet altogether, but IRL I couldn't move at all and in last night's dream I could at first. By the time Greg reached out and dragged me the rest of the way behind the rocks all I could do was lay there and hurt. I also somehow got turned onto my back, but don't know how. I was watching Greg trying to cap that third Afghani until I died. Even then I was still watching....



Quote:
Originally Posted by Lady Glock View Post
Remembering all who were and still are affected by the actions of the terrorists 10 years ago. I WILL NEVER FORGET!
Good. Neither will I.

We are where the surgery will be done on my back.......

Anyway...Wolfe, you know you are in my prayers...please, talk to us and don't ignore us. We WANT to be here for you, we WANT to talk to YOU even if you don't want to talk to US. You are important to us, don't forget that!
Hugs, though EXTREMELY gentle ones.
Allright, glad to hear you've made it that far. Now we'll pray that the surgery happens quickly and goes well. Then we'll worry about getting you home and employed, and your girl in school.

I really appreciate you wanting to be here for me, it really means a lot. What I was trying to say yesterday was a couple of things. The first part is that things are going to get hectic at times with everyone trying to wrap up operations here in Iraq. There may be times over the next several weeks when I don't have a connection as some services change hands, when I don't have time to get on, or with all the stress, just don't have the energy. Not that I don't want to talk or hear from you folks, I do.

The other part I was thinking about recently is that fact that I'm doing better, and sometimes I think I don't need the help I'm getting here quite as much, although other times I think I still do. But the other side of that is some of you have stuck with me through a really dark time in my life that's gone on for over 2 years now. You've seen the pain, the setbacks, the times I've felt so hopeles all I wanted to do was give up. So I also think you, my friends, deserve to see me getting better and share in the reward. You're a big part of why, so you should have the chance to see.

There will come a time when I won't post in here daily, but I'll probably post updates and major happenings in my life for as long as I can see interest in here. I also hope the regulars who have shared their own trials will keep us all up to date, too.



Quote:
Originally Posted by Silent_Runner View Post
Wolfe I understand you may have trouble getting on some days for a while but please don't disappear on us. We worry about you when you are not here to talk.

Thank you for posting this. Today is the tenth anniversary of the day that caused everything we have talked about in this thread to happen. Wolfe do you remember the promise you made in here two years ago? You keep on fighting and never let them beat you!

.
As I mentioned above, it may not always be possible for the next couple months. Besides, in the years I've known you I've disappeared for weeks or months at a time and you never got yourself all worked up about it. You just waited until I came back around, and kept a beer in the fridge for when I did.

Yes, I remember that post. In fact I looked it up yesterday, thanks to Engineer. I said I wasn't going to let them terrorist bastards beat me and I haven't. I won't deny that my resolve hasn't slipped badly at times, but I'm still here and they're still in hell.
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To those who have made the ultimate sacrifice while defending American freedom, you will not be forgotten.

RIP my friends Greg and Florence, see you again on the other side.
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Old 09-11-2011, 20:27   #7967
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Hi Sweetheart! A certain beagle wants to say something afterhe read you're still here and they're still in Hell.
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Old 09-11-2011, 21:18   #7968
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I understand why you can't post every day. My goal is for you not to need us anymore, although you'll always be my friend.
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Old 09-12-2011, 11:20   #7969
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Thank you for explaining that to me...now I understand!

Just got out of the appointment with the surgeon. He says something totally different than anyone else has said. EVERYONE else I've seen says that the MRI and the pain locations and symptoms all point to the need to remove the protrusion. He says my pain activity doesn't point to the protrusion as being the problem and that he wants to try the cortosone shot and if that doesn't work I have to see a neurologist. I am so angry, I don't know what to think. I'm going to be praying hard that the shot (under anethesia, so same day surgery still, just not what I was expecting) does what they expect it to and the pain is relieved. If not, I will be stuck with the pain as I can't stay here to see the neurologist. The procedure will be on Wednesday morning, 8 am.
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Old 09-12-2011, 12:26   #7970
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LG, I've always heard that if you can avoid back surgery, do it. I know this is inconvenient for you but I think your surgeon just wants to try other alternatives before cutting on you. I'm praying that this will work for you.
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Old 09-12-2011, 13:59   #7971
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Originally Posted by Lone_Wolfe View Post

As Silent_Runner said, there's been other times when Greg didn't die, or at least I din't think he did. Most of the ones where I die quickly, like when the bullet gets through the armor I don't dream of him coming out to me very often. What was different about this dream is that it's the first time I had any ability at all to try to move and try to get to cover after getting hit. I still like the idea better of being able to dodge the bulllet altogether, but IRL I couldn't move at all and in last night's dream I could at first. By the time Greg reached out and dragged me the rest of the way behind the rocks all I could do was lay there and hurt. I also somehow got turned onto my back, but don't know how. I was watching Greg trying to cap that third Afghani until I died. Even then I was still watching....


As I mentioned above, it may not always be possible for the next couple months. Besides, in the years I've known you I've disappeared for weeks or months at a time and you never got yourself all worked up about it. You just waited until I came back around, and kept a beer in the fridge for when I did.
l.
Wolfe just the fact that even a part of what you have been visualizing made it into your dream sounds like a great step. Have you told your shrink about this? I would be curious what he has to say. Did you have another similar dream last night?

I know you used to disappear for long periods of time without us worrying about each other bu that was before you got yourself shot in a war and almost died!

Your timing is pretty good with your slow down in posting anticipated. As we have talked about privately I may not be able to be in here nearly as much for a while or possibly permanently. I will still get here when I can to keep prodding you since BobInTX is cutting you more slack than I would.

Quote:
Originally Posted by 23skidoo View Post
Hi Sweetheart! A certain beagle wants to say something afterhe read you're still here and they're still in Hell. :
Do you always let dogs speak for you?

What do you think of what she wrote? I think she is making large steps forward at last and am happy that all of you will be able to see it too.

Quote:
Originally Posted by BobInTX View Post
I understand why you can't post every day. My goal is for you not to need us anymore, although you'll always be my friend.
You are going easy on her but we do share the same goal. I will always think of you as a friend also for what you are doing for her.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Lady Glock View Post
Thank you for explaining that to me...now I understand!

Just got out of the appointment with the surgeon. He says something totally different than anyone else has said. EVERYONE else I've seen says that the MRI and the pain locations and symptoms all point to the need to remove the protrusion. He says my pain activity doesn't point to the protrusion as being the problem and that he wants to try the cortosone shot and if that doesn't work I have to see a neurologist. I am so angry, I don't know what to think. I'm going to be praying hard that the shot (under anethesia, so same day surgery still, just not what I was expecting) does what they expect it to and the pain is relieved. If not, I will be stuck with the pain as I can't stay here to see the neurologist. The procedure will be on Wednesday morning, 8 am.
I hope he is right and the cortisone gives you lasting relief. I will pray that it does.

Quote:
Originally Posted by BobInTX View Post
LG, I've always heard that if you can avoid back surgery, do it. I know this is inconvenient for you but I think your surgeon just wants to try other alternatives before cutting on you. I'm praying that this will work for you.
That is correct. Back surgery is risky and best avoided if possible. But if it is what you need then nothing else will give real relief. I pray that Lady Glock's surgeon ir right about her.
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I mean, Iím mentally ill, not mentally deficient! There's a difference between psycho and stupid.
Rest in Peace Jeff Abshire-1962-2012-aka 23Skidoo
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Old 09-12-2011, 14:33   #7972
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Wolfe just the fact that even a part of what you have been visualizing made it into your dream sounds like a great step. Have you told your shrink about this? I would be curious what he has to say. Did you have another similar dream last night? Yes, do tell.

I know you used to disappear for long periods of time without us worrying about each other bu that was before you got yourself shot in a war and almost died! I knew that was coming!

Your timing is pretty good with your slow down in posting anticipated. As we have talked about privately I may not be able to be in here nearly as much for a while or possibly permanently. I will still get here when I can to keep prodding you since BobInTX is cutting you more slack than I would.

What? So now I'm just going to be in here by myself and Snoopy?

SR, I hope you get your problems worked out. And please don't make your absence permanent.

What do you think of what she wrote? I think she is making large steps forward at last and am happy that all of you will be able to see it too.

I was very encouraged.

You are going easy on her but we do share the same goal. I will always think of you as a friend also for what you are doing for her.

Awww, thanks.
I hope he is right and the cortisone gives you lasting relief. I will pray that it does.


That is correct. Back surgery is risky and best avoided if possible. But if it is what you need then nothing else will give real relief. I pray that Lady Glock's surgeon ir right about her.
Me too. Don't expect immediate results from the shot. The injection site will hurt for a few days.
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Old 09-12-2011, 20:58   #7973
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Originally Posted by 23skidoo View Post
Hi Sweetheart! A certain beagle wants to say something afterhe read you're still here and they're still in Hell. : snoopy:: hugs:: hearts:: smootchie:: iloveyou:
I've been still here for over 40 years and they've been in hell for 10. That mutt just now decided to dance?


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I understand why you can't post every day. My goal is for you not to need us anymore, although you'll always be my friend.
Once I reach the point that I don't need you I'll sure miss talking to you. Ironic right, after all the times I just don't feel like talking to you. But it's because of the subject matter, not who I'm talking to. I'll always think of you and several others in here as friends.

Got to admit you surprised me. I half expected you guys to dogpile me again for saying that I might not post every day for a while.



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Thank you for explaining that to me...now I understand!
Good, I didn't want you to take it the wrong way.

Just got out of the appointment with the surgeon. ....
Wow. Like everyone's said before me, I sure hope he's right.

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Originally Posted by Silent_Runner View Post
Wolfe just the fact that even a part of what you have been visualizing made it into your dream sounds like a great step. Have you told your shrink about this? I would be curious what he has to say. Did you have another similar dream last night?

I know you used to disappear for long periods of time without us worrying about each other bu that was before you got yourself shot in a war and almost died!

Oops...

Your timing is pretty good with your slow down in posting anticipated. As we have talked about privately I may not be able to be in here nearly as much for a while or possibly permanently. I will still get here when I can to keep prodding you since BobInTX is cutting you more slack than I would.: whistling:
.
Yes, I talked to my shrink today about it. He said it was a major breakthough, a sign that the psychosis is breaking. He's convinced (as was my last 2 shrinks) that the psychosis is what made the nightmares different, to include 'locking out' any input from me, such as the visualizations. For one to have happened, even a small change like that, he likened to the small crack in a dam. He said once that dam starts to give way it's just a matter of time.

Then he commented that he wished it had heppened while my previous shrink was here. When I looked surprised he said that he'd worked so hard with me and had mentioned looking something like this in his notes, so my new shrink thought he deserved to know it had finally happened. I thought that was really decent of him to say. The nightmares I've had since then are more of the same, no more breakdancing after being shot like the one. I still like the idea of dodging that damn bullet better!

I know Silent_Runner still insists that I don't post her issues here, and even thought I disagree, I have no choice but to respect her wishes. And she does post elsewhere. But I'm going to risk pissing her off by asking for a lot of prayers for her. Please, a lot.



Quote:
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.I knew that was coming!
And I should have known.

What? So now I'm just going to be in here by myself and Snoopy?
I hope not. I'm sure you can persuade Skidoo to speak for himself before that mutt gets him in trouble.

SR, I hope you get your problems worked out. And please don't make your absence permanent.
Amen to that!
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To those who have made the ultimate sacrifice while defending American freedom, you will not be forgotten.

RIP my friends Greg and Florence, see you again on the other side.
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Old 09-12-2011, 23:05   #7974
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Silent Runner, we love you, too.
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Old 09-13-2011, 06:08   #7975
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What do I think of what she wrote? Boy howdy! I am ecstatic! See Miss S_R? The mutt doesn't always speak for me.

Bob, I doubt you and I will be the only ones cheering The Gorgeous One on.

Have a great day Babe.
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Old 09-13-2011, 08:52   #7976
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Old 09-13-2011, 14:42   #7977
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Prayers, prayers and more prayers for S_R...not sure what the need is, but God knows and that is what is important. I will be praying for her!
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Old 09-13-2011, 21:44   #7978
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BobInTX View Post
Silent Runner, we love you, too.
Even when she's looking for you with bats and needles?



Quote:
Originally Posted by 23skidoo View Post
What do I think of what she wrote? Boy howdy! I am ecstatic! See Miss S_R? The mutt doesn't always speak for me.: supergrin:

It's about time you say something for yourself! I thought I was going to have to ask Mitch to swat that mutt a time or 2.

Bob, I doubt you and I will be the only ones cheering The Gorgeous One on.

Have a great day Babe.: hugs:: hearts:: smootchie:: iloveyou:
Heh, easier said than done.



Quote:
Originally Posted by engineer151515 View Post
Lone_Wolfe : hugs:

Silent_Runner : hugs:
back to you.



Quote:
Originally Posted by Lady Glock View Post
Prayers, prayers and more prayers for S_R...not sure what the need is, but God knows and that is what is important. I will be praying for her!
Thanks, thanks, and more thanks for that. She really does need it.

I'll tell about my visit to my doc later, right now you folks please pray some more for Silent_Runner if you would.
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To those who have made the ultimate sacrifice while defending American freedom, you will not be forgotten.

RIP my friends Greg and Florence, see you again on the other side.
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RIP Jeff (23Skidoo) - 1962-2012 and Gloria (Silent_Runner) - 1964-2013
FREEDOM IS NOT FREE
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Old 09-14-2011, 02:58   #7979
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Prayers for Miss S_R, Miss Lady Glock, Bob's FIL, and of course, Miss Lone_
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Old 09-14-2011, 03:33   #7980
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and add to THAT some really sloppy, sluppy, slubberly kisses to Skido!!!!!!!!
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