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Old 07-21-2012, 05:48   #9326
4TS&W
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Originally Posted by ancient_serpent View Post
Thought it might brighten your day if I introduced the newest member of our family:

Ladies and Gentlemen, I give you Angus the Destroyer.

Okie Memorial Area
Time to build a bomb shelter!


Sent via telepathy
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Old 07-21-2012, 06:01   #9327
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Originally Posted by ancient_serpent View Post

Ladies and Gentlemen, I give you Angus the Destroyer.

Okie Memorial Area
Okie Memorial Area
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Old 07-22-2012, 06:49   #9328
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^^That's funny.^^

Harness/Leash training:
Okie Memorial Area
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Last edited by ancient_serpent; 07-22-2012 at 06:52..
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Old 07-22-2012, 06:54   #9329
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Originally Posted by 4TS&W View Post
Time to build a bomb shelter!


Sent via telepathy
Not sure that would help, if direct force fails he would "cute" his way inside.
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Old 07-22-2012, 21:39   #9330
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ancient_serpent View Post
Thought it might brighten your day if I introduced the newest member of our family:

Ladies and Gentlemen, I give you Angus the Destroyer.
AWWWWWWWWWWWWW!, what an adorable little ink blot!

So has he lived up to his name yet?



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Originally Posted by ancient_serpent View Post

Harness/Leash training:
We're really going to miss you around here.



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Originally Posted by ancient_serpent View Post
Not sure that would help, if direct force fails he would "cute" his way inside.
He could do that easily!



Quote:
Originally Posted by 23skidoo View Post
Hi Sweetheart! You asked if we really wanted to know. Yes Sweetheart, I want to know. Gentle as a kitten
OK, guess you could read any post I've made complaining that my chest hurts and I feel crappy from the chemo, and it'd apply today. Ugh! I spent the entire day holding down the couch again, I only got up to eat.





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Originally Posted by BobInTX View Post
I hurt pretty bad this morning, so I guess it's the pain killers.
Wish I could send you some of mine, they'd probably work better for you than they do for me.

I know you're having them about different locations now. That why I suggested you visualize being in those places. Visualizing different endings isn't working, so I thought maybe telling yourself they aren't real and having them fade away might help.
Sounds like something to try. Can't do any worse than not work.

You said before that you didn't think the breast cancer itself was a PTSD event, but that website I sent you on DM said that illnesses can be. I know it can't help matters. You are afraid for your life again.
That makes sense in a way, since this is definitely life threatening. I'm actually not as afraid of dying so much as afraid of how painfully I might die from this. I'd rather just get shot again without the medic nearby.

God hears our prayers. I know it doesn't seem like it sometimes, and we feel like he just doesn't care and it really tests our faith. I know it did mine when you got breast cancer after I prayed so hard for you to be healed of your other pain and mental anguish. The difference in God's understanding and ours is a million times the difference between me and my one year old granddaughter. I know he cares because he gave his Son to die for us. But it still sucks.

Psalm 22
My God, My God, why have You forsaken Me?
.....................
It does mine too, I really don't have strong faith at all, especially now. I know I sent up prayers for people that need it, and for myself, but I'm not sure there's anyone up there listening. If there is, I hope he's got a good reason for all of this. Yeah, it does suck. I'll be sooooo glad when I'm done with chemo.
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Old 07-23-2012, 05:25   #9331
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After a long day of destruction (I have kitty tooth and claw marks to prove it):
Okie Memorial Area
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Old 07-23-2012, 14:15   #9332
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Yes Sweetheart, I read your posts, I hope it helps you even just a little bit to voice what hurts you rather than suffer in silence; and, tomorrow is another day, I remain hopeful you will feel a little better than today.
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Old 07-23-2012, 14:38   #9333
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The first round is a moral decision. All of the following rounds are tactical decisions.
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Old 07-25-2012, 11:25   #9334
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Originally Posted by CJStudent View Post
: hugs:
back at ya.



Quote:
Originally Posted by ancient_serpent View Post
After a long day of destruction (I have kitty tooth and claw marks to prove it):
Okie Memorial Area
You can't convince me any kitty who looks that sweet would ever do anything to hurt anyone!



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Originally Posted by 23skidoo View Post
Yes Sweetheart, I read your posts, I hope it helps you even just a little bit to voice what hurts you rather than suffer in silence; and, tomorrow is another day, I remain hopeful you will feel a little better than today.
Yeah, sometimes it does. I'm hopeful about tomorrow too, since I'm done with the A/C chemo regimen. My doc cleared me today to start the Taxol, so I'll know soon if I tolerate that better. She's still concerned about the dizzy spells I'm having though. She wants me to see a neurologist, I have an appointment next month. Hopefully he'll be able to find a brain in there.

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RIP my friends Greg and Florence, see you again on the other side.
RIP Jeff (23Skidoo) - 1962-2012 and Gloria (Silent_Runner) - 1964-2013
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Old 07-25-2012, 11:37   #9335
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Originally Posted by Lone_Wolfe View Post
back at ya.





You can't convince me any kitty who looks that sweet would ever do anything to hurt anyone!





Yeah, sometimes it does. I'm hopeful about tomorrow too, since I'm done with the A/C chemo regimen. My doc cleared me today to start the Taxol, so I'll know soon if I tolerate that better. She's still concerned about the dizzy spells I'm having though. She wants me to see a neurologist, I have an appointment next month. Hopefully he'll be able to find a brain in there.

Let us know what he finds in there; if there IS a brain in there, it'll be the discovery of the century!
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The first round is a moral decision. All of the following rounds are tactical decisions.
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Old 07-25-2012, 14:56   #9336
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I hope the Taxol has no ill effects on you but it drops the hammer on every single cancer cell in your body. There is most certainly a lucid working brain in there.
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Old 07-26-2012, 09:09   #9337
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Originally Posted by Lone_Wolfe View Post
OK, guess you could read any post I've made complaining that my chest hurts and I feel crappy from the chemo, and it'd apply today. Ugh! I spent the entire day holding down the couch again, I only got up to eat.

It does mine too, I really don't have strong faith at all, especially now. I know I sent up prayers for people that need it, and for myself, but I'm not sure there's anyone up there listening. If there is, I hope he's got a good reason for all of this. Yeah, it does suck. I'll be sooooo glad when I'm done with chemo.
I really hate it when I don't get an email when somebody posts. I thought everyone was awfully quiet.

It sounds like you're about half way through the chemo. Your friend is an angel for taking care of you. I hope you're expressing your appreciation to her.

I have faith that God is with you. I know it doesn't seem like it, but unfortunately we can't see how things would be if he wasn't. If God is answering our prayers, how would things be if he wasn't? What would that look like? Would you be even sicker from the chemo? Would you be dead now?

You could be locked away in a mental institution right now, if that doctor hadn't recognized that you were having that terrible reaction to the anti-depressants. And they probably would not have caught this cancer in its early stages in the loony bin because they would just keep feeding you pain killers instead of treating the problem and you never would have had that MRI. In fact, I doubt if you would have made it through 2009, the way you describe your reaction. Did that idea come to that Dr. out of nowhere, like mine do sometimes? Was that God at work?

Was someone praying for you back home? Was that why you survived getting shot? Your survival was pretty much miraculous. Even the medic was shocked that you made it when you were standing before him in Iraq. Was that God at work?

I believe God has helped you in ways that we can't possibly imagine. You are definitely suffering and in pain. But it might be worse.
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Old 07-26-2012, 13:15   #9338
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Hope you are feeling better. I hate that you are having to go through all this. You have had way more than your fair share of troubles...I pray it eases up soon and you get some good news for a change.
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Old 07-26-2012, 13:30   #9339
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I forgot to update y'all with my own gimp status.

I went back to the dr on Tuesday to get my MRI results. My MRI showed some bone spurs and moderately severe right narrowing of the lateral recesses of my L4-L5 disk. The doctor said that we would probably treat... that with injections for pain. The MRI also showed a thoracic (chest area) spinal cord syrinx, which is a fluid pocket in the spinal cord, which is not supposed to be there. This was totally unexpected and he wasn't looking for it at all. In fact, he had never seen one in the thoracic spine. But he said it was fortunate that we found it, because it can create all kinds of problems. Fortunately, I haven't presented any of the symptoms that this can create, so maybe I don't have any spine damage yet.

Before he treats the lower back with injections, he wants me to get another MRI with contrast on the thoracic area . Then he is going to refer me to a neurosurgeon, because he is more of a extremities guy than a spine guy. But he told me this isn't something to go home and lose sleep over, so I'm trying not to.

Bottom line is that it will probably be another couple of weeks now before I get to see the neurosurgeon and find out what we are going to do about everything. Until then, hydrocodone is my best friend. On the bright side, I'm not having to take time off from work because of it. Except for MRI's of course. This will be my third one.
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Old 07-28-2012, 00:38   #9340
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Quote:
Originally Posted by CJStudent View Post
Let us know what he finds in there; if there IS a brain in there, it'll be the discovery of the century!


Oh wait, I resemble that remark...

Quote:
Originally Posted by 23skidoo View Post
I hope the Taxol has no ill effects on you but it drops the hammer on every single cancer cell in your body. There is most certainly a lucid working brain in there.: :
That's a nice thought, but the Taxol is already giving me a hard time. Not as bad as the other uet, and hopefully it won't. But I'll sure be glad when all this is over.





Quote:
Originally Posted by Lady Glock View Post
Hope you are feeling better. I hate that you are having to go through all this. You have had way more than your fair share of troubles...I pray it eases up soon and you get some good news for a change.
Thank you, I hope you get some good news, too.

BTW, how is Ranger?



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Originally Posted by BobInTX View Post
I forgot to update y'all with my own gimp status.

........
Sounds like you might be real lucky that it was caught early. Guess for now all you can do is stone post and we can pray. As for MRI's, are you trying to catch up to me? If so, you'd better get cracking, you've got a ways to go!



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Originally Posted by BobInTX View Post
I really hate it when I don't get an email when somebody posts. I thought everyone was awfully quiet.
What did you do, accidently unsubscribe to this thread?

It sounds like you're about half way through the chemo.
Timewise, it's not quite halfway, but it's close enough.

Your friend is an angel for taking care of you. I hope you're expressing your appreciation to her.
Yes, she is, and yes, I am.

I have faith that God is with you. I know it doesn't seem like it, but unfortunately we can't see how things would be if he wasn't. If God is answering our prayers, how would things be if he wasn't? What would that look like? Would you be even sicker from the chemo? Would you be dead now?
I don't know. I might be dead, I might have been dead long ago. Or I might have never gotten shot or gotten cancer.

You could be locked away in a mental institution right now, if that doctor hadn't recognized that you were having that terrible reaction to the anti-depressants. And they probably would not have caught this cancer in its early stages in the loony bin because they would just keep feeding you pain killers instead of treating the problem and you never would have had that MRI. In fact, I doubt if you would have made it through 2009, the way you describe your reaction. Did that idea come to that Dr. out of nowhere, like mine do sometimes? Was that God at work?
I'm sure I wouldn't have made it through 2009 if that doc hadn't figured out what was wrong. I don't think I'd have made it another month. I can't tell if the cancer would have been caught by anyone in a looney bin, because the tumor because visible just a few weeks after the MRI picked it up. But someone in there would have had to pay attention to me or looked at it.As for where the doc got the idea, I've always credited his medical training for that. He said the signs of psychosis were "glaring", and he couldn't believe no one spotted them sooner.

Was someone praying for you back home? Was that why you survived getting shot? Your survival was pretty much miraculous. Even the medic was shocked that you made it when you were standing before him in Iraq. Was that God at work?
I have no idea if anyone was praying when I got shot. True, my survival was really unlikely and several medical people called me a miracle. I can't say if God had a hand in it, but I give a lot of credit to a medic who just wouldn't let me stay dead. Of course the medical stall at the hospital had their work cut out for them once I got there.

I believe God has helped you in ways that we can't possibly imagine. You are definitely suffering and in pain. But it might be worse.
I often find myself thinking that the alternative would have been better. It'd have saved me a lot of pain all this time, physical and mental. I don't like so many things about myself these days. If God's using me for something anymore I sure don't see it. I guess the depression is getting to me.
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To those who have made the ultimate sacrifice while defending American freedom, you will not be forgotten.

RIP my friends Greg and Florence, see you again on the other side.
RIP Jeff (23Skidoo) - 1962-2012 and Gloria (Silent_Runner) - 1964-2013
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Old 07-28-2012, 00:49   #9341
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Hugs to you LW! ;-)
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Old 07-28-2012, 06:54   #9342
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Originally Posted by Lone_Wolfe View Post





I often find myself thinking that the alternative would have been better. It'd have saved me a lot of pain all this time, physical and mental. I don't like so many things about myself these days. If God's using me for something anymore I sure don't see it. I guess the depression is getting to me.
the alternative would not be better. no way, no how, no further dicussion. look at all you can do! you are gonna be able to help someone else through this. you are gonna be that voice of reason and strength....right?
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Old 07-28-2012, 08:34   #9343
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Originally Posted by jakebrake View Post
the alternative would not be better. no way, no how, no further dicussion. look at all you can do! you are gonna be able to help someone else through this. you are gonna be that voice of reason and strength....right?
What he said!



Trust me, something I believe to the core of my being: Everything happens for a reason, and it'll work out how it's supposed to in the end.
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The first round is a moral decision. All of the following rounds are tactical decisions.
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Old 07-28-2012, 09:53   #9344
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I forgot to update y'all with my own gimp status.

I went back to the dr on Tuesday to get my MRI results. My MRI showed some bone spurs and moderately severe right narrowing of the lateral recesses of my L4-L5 disk. The doctor said that we would probably treat... that with injections for pain. The MRI also showed a thoracic (chest area) spinal cord syrinx, which is a fluid pocket in the spinal cord, which is not supposed to be there. This was totally unexpected and he wasn't looking for it at all. In fact, he had never seen one in the thoracic spine. But he said it was fortunate that we found it, because it can create all kinds of problems. Fortunately, I haven't presented any of the symptoms that this can create, so maybe I don't have any spine damage yet.

Before he treats the lower back with injections, he wants me to get another MRI with contrast on the thoracic area . Then he is going to refer me to a neurosurgeon, because he is more of a extremities guy than a spine guy. But he told me this isn't something to go home and lose sleep over, so I'm trying not to.

Bottom line is that it will probably be another couple of weeks now before I get to see the neurosurgeon and find out what we are going to do about everything. Until then, hydrocodone is my best friend. On the bright side, I'm not having to take time off from work because of it. Except for MRI's of course. This will be my third one.
Sounds pretty serious to me. I was draggging my left leg because of a pain in my knee from one single bone spur. I could not walk a block. You can have as much pain from a little nerve pressure same as a pinched off nerve. That fluid pocket can effect anything in that area. Glad they caught that too.
I'm getting ready to have a Myelogram done on the disk I injured during rehab of my knee on the 1st of the month. I can't have a MRI because of the metal in my back. Not looking forward to it because that procedure hurts a lot, not to mention you get quite a few xrays while they try and position the needle to put the dye in the disk. Glad you're still active while taking that hydrocodone because all it does for me is bring on constipation. Hope you don't have to wait too long to have something done.
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LW would have laughed that round off her chest.
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And then gone and stuffed the gun up the ass of the Hajji bastard that shot me!
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Old 07-28-2012, 10:03   #9345
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I often find myself thinking that the alternative would have been better. It'd have saved me a lot of pain all this time, physical and mental. I don't like so many things about myself these days. If God's using me for something anymore I sure don't see it. I guess the depression is getting to me.
I can think of some grateful people because you are alive. I'm quite familiar with Mr. Depression, it's very difficult to ignore him all the time.
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LW would have laughed that round off her chest.
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And then gone and stuffed the gun up the ass of the Hajji bastard that shot me!
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Old 07-28-2012, 10:36   #9346
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Sweetheart, the world is most definitely a better place with you in it. Please don't lose sight of that.
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Old 07-29-2012, 20:32   #9347
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Hugs to you LW! ;-)
back, my friend.



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Originally Posted by jakebrake View Post
the alternative would not be better. no way, no how, no further dicussion. look at all you can do! you are gonna be able to help someone else through this. you are gonna be that voice of reason and strength....right?
I've always tried to be a voice of reason, but that doesn't mean I've succeeded. Strength? I don't think so. I sure don't have much of that. If I thought I was weak while I was overseas, I didn't know what weak was. Now I can't even stand up for more than a few minutes at a time. I just find myself thinking that when this chemo is finished, I'll either be cured, or I'll find out I'm not going to be cured. If I can't be cured, there's not much I can do about it. If I am, then I hope to be able to go back to my job and finish what I started. I know that's not really my life over there, but this feels even less like my life. This is just an interruption that I want to be over with.



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Originally Posted by CJStudent View Post
What he said!

: hugs:

Trust me, something I believe to the core of my being: Everything happens for a reason, and it'll work out how it's supposed to in the end. : hugs:
Yeah, I just find myself wondering what the reason might be.

back.



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Originally Posted by Magnus2131 View Post
I can think of some grateful people because you are alive. I'm quite familiar with Mr. Depression, it's very difficult to ignore him all the time. : hugs:
I think he's taken up permanent residence in my head. He's sure gotten the better of me these days.





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Originally Posted by 23skidoo View Post
Sweetheart, the world is most definitely a better place with you in it. Please don't lose sight of that.
There are some who'd beg to differ with you, and I'm one of them at times.

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To those who have made the ultimate sacrifice while defending American freedom, you will not be forgotten.

RIP my friends Greg and Florence, see you again on the other side.
RIP Jeff (23Skidoo) - 1962-2012 and Gloria (Silent_Runner) - 1964-2013
FREEDOM IS NOT FREE
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Old 07-29-2012, 20:39   #9348
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Originally Posted by Lone_Wolfe View Post



Yeah, I just find myself wondering what the reason might be.

back.



There are some who'd beg to differ with you, and I'm one of them at times.



I think that reason is to show people what real strength is. As much as you try to deny it, it shows through anyways. And that, my dear, can show other people that they too can keep going, no matter what life throws at them. Sometimes, I get to feeling completely overwhelmed with general "life" stuff (cars breaking, work being stupid, financial stress, etc). Then I come read this thread, and you show me what real strength is, and it keeps me going; I want to thank you for that.

And listen to Skidoo; he knows what he's talking about!
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The first round is a moral decision. All of the following rounds are tactical decisions.
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Old 07-29-2012, 20:49   #9349
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God Bless you.
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janice6

"Peace is that brief, glorious moment in history when everybody stands around reloading". Anonymous

Earp: Not everyone who knows you hates you.
DOC: I know it ain't always easy bein' my friend....but I'll BE THERE when you need me.
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Old 07-29-2012, 23:16   #9350
MB-G26
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Join Date: Oct 2001
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Wahhhhhhhhhhhh......... are you ever gonna get a USA phone now that you're back?????????????????????

<-----------less than a patient person (hehe....get it?)
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I am slowly falling apart - I wish you'd take a walk in my shoes for a start. You might think it's easy being me ... Sometimes I find myself shaking - In the middle of the night. And then it hits me and I can't - Even believe this is my life
(The Wreckers; "Stand Still; Look Pretty")
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