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Old 01-17-2011, 11:42   #6581
Lone_Wolfe
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tenngunner View Post
When does the rainy season end there? Here's hoping you feel better.
In a couple of months. We've been lucky this year in that we've had a lot less rain than last year, I'm really glad of that. What made this one so bad was high and low pressures were rolling in and out all day. That, and I was running out of my add-on meds. I could describe in geat detail each bone that was broken.

I'm still feeling it, but not like I was. Thanks.
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To those who have made the ultimate sacrifice while defending American freedom, you will not be forgotten.

RIP my friends Greg and Florence, see you again on the other side.
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Old 01-17-2011, 12:13   #6582
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Originally Posted by Silent_Runner View Post
Wolfe another thing you could do is check in with us. We are concerned.

The last I heard from Wolfe was a couple days ago. She mentioned severe weather related pain. She may have had to go to the hospital and not be able to get online. Hopefully she will be able to post later and is doing OK.
Squeeze free Sweetheart. that you're well enough to post this evening.
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Old 01-17-2011, 14:59   #6583
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I've learned over the years that if you don't get exactly what you want, you'll never satisfy the desire. :cool:
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Old 01-17-2011, 17:22   #6584
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Originally Posted by sawgrass View Post
: hugs:: hugs:
Those things better not have squeezes in them! But if they don't, back!



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Originally Posted by 23skidoo View Post
Squeeze free Sweetheart.: hugs: that you're well enough to post this evening.
There's that snitching mutt! He convinced Mandy to get into my chocolate again while I was gone.



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Originally Posted by Magnus2131 View Post
Have to agree. You have a lot of shoulders here to cry on. Don't hold back!
I've done my share of that and think I will still more. I thank you so much for the hugs.

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Love you LW sweetheart: smootchie:: hugs:: hearts:
Love you too, okie.



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Originally Posted by MB-G26 View Post
About 8:35pm Flagstaff time............. STILL can't get through to you on hajiiverisonnet cell phone number you gave me several months ago, .................... what give????????????/// it should be 'bout waking time your time therre.........?
This time it was my fault, sorry. I went to the hospital without my cell phone. robe, or Mandy. I wasn't thinking clearly. BTW, 8:35 there is about 6:30AM here. A bit early, since it's been taking a few hours most nights for my sleep meds to knock me out.

I was glad they knocked me on my ass pretty good, but when one of the medics offered to take me to a computer I almost fell over when I sat up. He rescinded his offer pretty quickly, can't say I blamed him. I think he'd have had to wipe me off the floor. My shrink stopped by to see me the next day, but being that stones doesn't make for good conversation. He said I was starting to let the crap out, which would do me a lot of good. The doing me good part I like, but facing it all sucks.


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Originally Posted by sawgrass View Post
It's good to let it out, you know that.
I sent you a link and a reply to your email.
I got your email, wrote a reply, deleted it, wrote another, deleted it, and wrote part of another that I need to finish. I got the link too, thanks. How are you doing today?
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To those who have made the ultimate sacrifice while defending American freedom, you will not be forgotten.

RIP my friends Greg and Florence, see you again on the other side.
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RIP Jeff (23Skidoo) - 1962-2012 and Gloria (Silent_Runner) - 1964-2013
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Old 01-17-2011, 18:02   #6585
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hahaha it shouldn't be that difficult...
I'm glad you got the link. I've looked at it, I hope it's beneficial.
Your absence made me look at options...I hope you are feeling better.
It seems like you have been feeling worse than usual for over a month.
Is anyone looking at why? Meds?

No squeezes here, just a kind warm hug. Hang in there Wolfe.
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Old 01-18-2011, 03:30   #6586
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Originally Posted by sawgrass View Post
hahaha it shouldn't be that difficult...
I'm glad you got the link. I've looked at it, I hope it's beneficial.
Your absence made me look at options...I hope you are feeling better.
It seems like you have been feeling worse than usual for over a month.
Is anyone looking at why? Meds?

No squeezes here, just a kind warm hug. Hang in there Wolfe.
It's just a matter of thinking about what I want to say sometimes.....

As for those options you're referring to, care to share? Yeah, my doc has been trying to figure out what's been going on lately. He commented about how recovery from a bad injury can be a step forward and a step back, but I can tell it's bugging him that I'm not doing better than I am. He's said more than once that if I could get better care from the VA he'd yank my country clearance so I could go home and recuperate there, but since that's not a good option he's going to keep working with me for as long as he can.

Thanks. I need them I'm still hangin' in.
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To those who have made the ultimate sacrifice while defending American freedom, you will not be forgotten.

RIP my friends Greg and Florence, see you again on the other side.
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Old 01-18-2011, 08:53   #6587
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Last edited by BobInTX; 01-18-2011 at 08:53..
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Old 01-18-2011, 11:58   #6588
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 23skidoo View Post
Squeeze free Sweetheart. that you're well enough to post this evening.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lone_Wolfe View Post





There's that snitching mutt! He convinced Mandy to get into my chocolate again while I was gone.



















I will feed him some of Okie's Rocky Mountain oysters, but where am I going to find the ingredients?
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Old 01-18-2011, 17:11   #6589
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Originally Posted by BobInTX View Post
back at ya. How's the in-laws doing? How have you been doing besides busy?



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Originally Posted by 23skidoo View Post
I will feed him some of Okie's Rocky Mountain oysters, but where am I going to find the ingredients?
If you're sending oyster you have to get them past me before any critters get them. Good luck with that.



Quote:
Originally Posted by Silent_Runner View Post
sawgrass you are so right about her letting it out. How are you doing? I hope you are feeling better lately. You are still in my prayers.

sawgrass, you're in mine too with all you've gone through.

Yes that is a good thing. It means some of that crap in your head is starting to come out. Please let it keep pouring out. I know it hurts not but that is how you will be able to find peace again. Go right ahead and cry. You need that more than anything right now.
It's still coming out, you got your way. I was doing OK until I was sitting in my shrinks office today and he asked what it would take to get me to forgive myself. I sat there and thought about and the next thing I knew I was crying and screaming that I didn't mean to get anyone killed, that I didn't know, that I shouldn't be to blame, that it was all my fault and I should be to blame, then it wasn't my fault again but God should forgive me anyway, that I shouldn't need forgiveness, and so on...... I think you get the point.

I don't know what's going on in my head right now, but it's a damn mess.
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To those who have made the ultimate sacrifice while defending American freedom, you will not be forgotten.

RIP my friends Greg and Florence, see you again on the other side.
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RIP Jeff (23Skidoo) - 1962-2012 and Gloria (Silent_Runner) - 1964-2013
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Old 01-18-2011, 19:01   #6590
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Pm sent,.......
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Old 01-18-2011, 23:05   #6591
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Originally Posted by Lone_Wolfe View Post











It's still coming out, you got your way. I was doing OK until I was sitting in my shrinks office today and he asked what it would take to get me to forgive myself. I sat there and thought about and the next thing I knew I was crying and screaming that I didn't mean to get anyone killed, that I didn't know, that I shouldn't be to blame, that it was all my fault and I should be to blame, then it wasn't my fault again but God should forgive me anyway, that I shouldn't need forgiveness, and so on...... I think you get the point.

I don't know what's going on in my head right now, but it's a damn mess.
Let it out Sweetheart. Could you have ever opened up like that to your former psychiatrist? Things ARE getting better.
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Old 01-19-2011, 02:43   #6592
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Hey Silent_Runner, your name turned silver again. And I'm innocent, I swear it! Really



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Originally Posted by faawrenchbndr View Post
Pm sent,.......
Got it.



Quote:
Originally Posted by 23skidoo View Post
Let it out Sweetheart. Could you have ever opened up like that to your former psychiatrist? Things ARE getting better.
Which one? If you're referring to the one I had when this thread started, it's possible in this case. It came out in a rush and I didn't care who heard or what they thought. I had the claws out, which I don't often do to this one. At least I didn't take his face off.
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To those who have made the ultimate sacrifice while defending American freedom, you will not be forgotten.

RIP my friends Greg and Florence, see you again on the other side.
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RIP Jeff (23Skidoo) - 1962-2012 and Gloria (Silent_Runner) - 1964-2013
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Old 01-19-2011, 02:52   #6593
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I was referring to the one immediatelly prior to this one. Good morning Sweetheart.
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Old 01-19-2011, 09:03   #6594
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Originally Posted by Lone_Wolfe View Post
back at ya. How's the in-laws doing? How have you been doing besides busy?

It's still coming out, you got your way. I was doing OK until I was sitting in my shrinks office today and he asked what it would take to get me to forgive myself. I sat there and thought about and the next thing I knew I was crying and screaming that I didn't mean to get anyone killed, that I didn't know, that I shouldn't be to blame, that it was all my fault and I should be to blame, then it wasn't my fault again but God should forgive me anyway, that I shouldn't need forgiveness, and so on...... I think you get the point.

I don't know what's going on in my head right now, but it's a damn mess.
We are trying to get my MIL home by the end of the month. Her foot sores are healed up so she can walk on her foot now. My FIL's back is doing better, but he's driving my wife crazy. If he had his way I think she would be over there 24/7.

I'm doing okay. Our new grandbaby will be here in 2-3 weeks. About the time my MIL is supposed to come home.

It sounds like you had a breakthrough in your shrink session yesterday. Keep it up. You're head is trying to figure all of this out. That's why it's a mess.

FYI, when I read that I said "YES!!!"
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Old 01-19-2011, 11:31   #6595
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If you're sending oyster you have to get them past me before any critters get them. Good luck with that.




Ummmmmm, you know that's not the seafood kind don't ya.

Hope your feeling better and letting the shrink know all.
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Old 01-19-2011, 13:04   #6596
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Let it out Sweetheart. Could you have ever opened up like that to your former psychiatrist? Things ARE getting better.
23skidoo I certainly hope this is the break she has needed so badly for so long. It would be such welcome news.

Quote:
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We are trying to get my MIL home by the end of the month. Her foot sores are healed up so she can walk on her foot now. My FIL's back is doing better, but he's driving my wife crazy. If he had his way I think she would be over there 24/7.

I'm doing okay. Our new grandbaby will be here in 2-3 weeks. About the time my MIL is supposed to come home.

It sounds like you had a breakthrough in your shrink session yesterday. Keep it up. You're head is trying to figure all of this out. That's why it's a mess.

FYI, when I read that I said "YES!!!"
BobInTX that is really good news about your MIL and FIL. I hope their progress continues. If you think Wolfe had a breakthrough then I am also hopeful. We can keep praying that it continues.


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Originally Posted by Lone_Wolfe View Post
It's still coming out, you got your way. I was doing OK until I was sitting in my shrinks office today and he asked what it would take to get me to forgive myself. I sat there and thought about and the next thing I knew I was crying and screaming that I didn't mean to get anyone killed, that I didn't know, that I shouldn't be to blame, that it was all my fault and I should be to blame, then it wasn't my fault again but God should forgive me anyway, that I shouldn't need forgiveness, and so on...... I think you get the point.

I don't know what's going on in my head right now, but it's a damn mess.
Wolfe it may be a mess but part of what I heard here is the truth. None of what happened is your fault and it sounds like you are beginning to accept that. As BobInTX said before you will probably always feel some guilt and pain but hopefully it will not control you. It it wants to come out please let it. The shoulders to cry on are here.
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I mean, Iím mentally ill, not mentally deficient! There's a difference between psycho and stupid.
Rest in Peace Jeff Abshire-1962-2012-aka 23Skidoo
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Old 01-19-2011, 13:34   #6597
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Hey Silent_Runner, your name turned silver again. And I'm innocent, I swear it! Really


Which one? If you're referring to the one I had when this thread started, it's possible in this case. It came out in a rush and I didn't care who heard or what they thought. I had the claws out, which I don't often do to this one. At least I didn't take his face off.
Wolfe I found out you really are innocent this time. I guess I should put my bat away for now. Maybe next time.

I doubt your shrink is worried about you clawing him a little. In fact he would probably welcome it as a good sign. Just do him a favor and trim your fingernails before your next appointment.
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On here I'm an *** hole.
In real life I'm an *** hole with a gun. :supergrin:
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I mean, Iím mentally ill, not mentally deficient! There's a difference between psycho and stupid.
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Old 01-19-2011, 15:33   #6598
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Originally Posted by Tenngunner View Post
Ummmmmm, you know that's not the seafood kind don't ya.

Hope your feeling better and letting the shrink know all.
My mom use to make Rocky mountain oyster soup/stew for Thanksgiving eve...it was tradition. I would get a different dinner only because the first time I ate it, I threw up all over the table. She made me potato soup instead.
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Old 01-19-2011, 17:10   #6599
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What you are going through IS confusing!! You are starting to realize and accept in your mind that you aren't guilty, but it still hurts in your heart that Greg died. I can totally understand your going back and forth with it in your heart and mind. Of course, we know that it isn't rational to feel guilty about it, but it is obviously hard to control. Please just know that given the same circumstances, we would all struggle with it. But, the bottom line is, you are NOT GUILTY!!

I wish that we could all come over to visit you one at a time and keep you company, giving you gentle hugs and encouragement. Although, I think that your Dr., terrorist and therapist do a pretty good job of making you feel very cared about. Though I am anxious for you to make that final breakthrough, I know somewhere inside you that you know you are not responsible for what happened. Gentle
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Old 01-19-2011, 18:16   #6600
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We are trying to get my MIL home by the end of the month. Her foot sores are healed up so she can walk on her foot now. My FIL's back is doing better, but he's driving my wife crazy. If he had his way I think she would be over there 24/7.

I'm doing okay. Our new grandbaby will be here in 2-3 weeks. About the time my MIL is supposed to come home.

It sounds like you had a breakthrough in your shrink session yesterday. Keep it up. You're head is trying to figure all of this out. That's why it's a mess.

FYI, when I read that I said "YES!!!"
I'll bet you're excited about the new baby. I'm glad the rest of the news on the homefront is good. Except poor Mrs. Bob's sanity, that is. I hope that gets better once the MIL is home.

I ran into my shrink today while I was waiting for my physical terrorist appointment. (He was cruel, BTW ) He had an appointment before mine. He came over to me and asked how I was feeling, and I could feel myself get all tense and my claws come out and I told him I didn't know, it was all so jumbled in my head. I was actually so uptight I started shaking, but he said that was good, just to leave it there and not worry about trying to sort it out myself, that we'll do that tomorrow. Then he told me "If you're talking to your internet friends and some of it wants to come out by all means let it. I'm not going to turn down any help".

I was glad he left then, because I was trying not to bawl before my terrorist even got ahold of me. He made me cry too, but a different kind of crying.
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To those who have made the ultimate sacrifice while defending American freedom, you will not be forgotten.

RIP my friends Greg and Florence, see you again on the other side.
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RIP Jeff (23Skidoo) - 1962-2012 and Gloria (Silent_Runner) - 1964-2013
FREEDOM IS NOT FREE
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