I'm basically the last survivor in my biological family. I have seen it happen in all manners. either way is it's own form of torture. (something worse actually).
There is no way that's "better" than others there is no "easy" way.
My only advice, for what it is worth, is to really find out who your friends are by finding one who didn't know the departed at all and talk to them. It really does help to let it out with someone who isn't grieving as well, or doesn't have anything to add in terms of their own memories. That way you get to "exercise' the things that are foremost in your mind without interruption and without taking on their memories.
I hope that makes some sense.
My sympathy and good thoughts being sent out.