Originally Posted by scottydl
^^ Perfect example of unnecessary (but required) legalese in Illinois is the "Warning to Motorist" that must be read during DUI arrest processing. We are required to read word-for-word (takes about 5 minutes) seemingly endless repeating legal text without allowing any interruptions or questions. Then I usually sum it up for the defendant in about 5 seconds... "blow in this machine in 20 minutes and your license is only suspended for 6 months. Otherwise it's a year." How it was turned into so much legal mumbo-jumbo is beyond me.
Our DUI form has several sections I read verbatim to avoid any issues in court, however I have yet to read them and not have to restate it in normal English so the customer can understand.
The other night there was a loud argument in the hall outside my apartment while I was trying to sleep. I went out and told them they better leave or I was gonna use some Kung-Fu... THAT scared them off...
Plus I was totally nekkid and holding a gun.