Terrible arc trajectory? Are you shooting at people 100 yards away? Any caliber is point of aim at defensive ranges. And if you need to shoot at someone far away, you should be using a rifle.
135-155gr in .40 and 165-200 gr. in .45 are the worst for penetration in those calibers. 165 or 180 gr. in .40 and 200 or 230 gr. in .45 give you better sectional density in either caliber, hence better penetration, without over penetrating with JHPs.
But can you please site your sources for your claims? Or are they opinion based and biased because you are a cop and are issued .40 S&W?
A .45 FMJ will penetrate about 30 or more inches in ballistics gel an have been known to penetrate through and through a deer and certainly through a person, as can any major caliber. And ALL hollow point defensive rounds are designed to penetrate about 12-15 inches, per FBI protocol and Police demands. And the heavier rounds are less likely to deflect and go off course once they encounter an obstacle, like glass, metal or bone. And if you need barrier penetration, you need heavy bullets or fast rounds, like the .357 Sig or 10 mm.
But to claim that the .45 is slow and ineffective is ignorant. You can run 230 gr. rounds at 950 fps or 165 gr. rounds at 1225 fps if you are a velocity junkie. Or you can run 185 gr. rounds at 1150 fps. But oh, I forgot - 1200 fps is slow and .451" hollow points that penetrate to about 15 inches and open up to .80" are not effective.
Check out tests 1, 2 and 3.
Windshield, inside-out: Winner .45.
Windshield, outside-in: Winner .45
Car door: Winner all (a car door isn't stopping anything)
Also, look at the FBI testing and average out the penetration numbers and tell me what you find. Most tests show that the penetration numbers on .40 and .45 are nearly identical. The advantage in the .45 is a larger diameter bullet and a heavier bullet that deflects less.
To be honest, I don't know where you get this crap. Maybe go read some stuff and then come back here and speak intelligently. Sorry, there is just no way to candy coat that.